He never was this heartbroken not even after him and Selena broke up. I took it too far, too too far. I laid onto my bed hearing his loud cries in the room next to mine. The more he cried the more guilt I felt. I’m not going to apologize either.
Its been days, weeks technically and all I ever hear is his cries. He puts on this smile that makes me believe he is over it but when night hits he’s in his room crying himself to sleep. Its only us in this suite, we have separate room because well of what happened before I did that thing. My dad is in the living room on the couch. He was going to sleep with me in my bed but he got tired of staying up listening to Justin loud cries.
I went in there one time and almost cried. I don’t think he knows he’s crying. He’s having this nightmare every night now. And like he moves around in bed with tears falling off his head. He’s moving in the streets holding onto the pillows tight just crying loudly with his eyes shut. Almost like he’s in pain. Not just any pain like too much pain, unbearable pain.
I wanted to wake him up but I don’t know after what I did for him to wake and see me and um, it would be awkward. He wakes up with this smile that is so real but like seriously every night he has that nightmare and it tears me apart. I overheard him say my name once. He may had said it once but I just know its me, its all my damn fault.
I walked into the kitchen in a robe with my eyes on the ground fresh out the shower. I wasn’t really looking up just zoned out with the cries from last night. I bumped into a royal blue brick wall? In the middle of the kitchen? I held my head and looked up seeing Justin starring down at me with his lips parted. He did say anything nor did he show any expression. I looked away from his brown orbs the guilt unbearable.
The whole day he hasn’t looked at me. He wore that smile and performed even tweeted. He was back to his normal self today. This day was different. He was like his old self for real like he did the One Less Lonely Girl and even brought them up to flirt with them, not that I’m jealous. I love when he treats them like their his girlfriend it shows Beliebers and me that he really is dedicated and also happy with us-them. I’m not one, not really.
"Enjoy the show?"Alfredo asked as we all got into the car to head to our suite. Justin looked over here before turning back. "Yeah, I always enjoy the shows well except for when I passed out, other than that I always know they are going to be amazing."I smiled. He smiled a little before nodding. "Who did you enjoy most out there?"He asked. I looked up at him with an eyebrow raised.
"When did you start raising your eyebrow? You never did that unti-" "I enjoyed everyone especially the amazing Beliebers and I guess the eyebrow thing had rubbed off on me."I shrug. He smirked before turning to Justin who happened to be looked over at us. "I’m really tired."I yawned. "And we are very energetic, come on, stop being oblivious."Fredo laughed.
We arrived to the suite and everyone went to theirs. I went to my room and laid down preparing for the cries. I looked at my clock from the ceiling and its about 1:34 and nothing happened. I got up and walked over to his room seeing he was sleeping like a baby.
He’s over me? I should be happy, I am happy. I sighed stroking his soft brown hair. I feel like a creep, a lonely one. I climbed into his bed wrapping my arms around his torso laying my head on his chest. He turned over to me still sleeping. I closed my eyes getting sleepy after looking at his soft face.
"What is she doing here, Usher?"I heard a sleepy Justin asked pulling away. I suddenly felt lonely and cold. "I don’t know, do you think I would put my daughter in here with you?"He asked. "Um, I don’t know."I heard him say before I felt someone lifting me up. "No, she can stay, it doesn’t matter, I was just wondering why she was here. Don’t wake her up, I don’t need more awkwardness between us."He sighed.
"Okay."I felt my dad I guess lay me back down. I felt cover being pulled over me before a door closed. Minus well sleep in. It smells exactly like him. I put the pillow to my nose and fell back asleep.
"Are you sure you didn’t put her in there because you wanted her bed to yourself?"I asked going to make some cereal. "I’m sure. I was in the living room the whole time. Maybe she walked in there herself, maybe she missed you."He replied. I stopped pouring my lucky charms and looked at him seeing he was making some breakfast and actually serious.
"That’s humanly impossible. She hates my guts. She nearly destroyed our memories. She hates me again maybe even more."I replied shrugging. "Why don’t you do the same then she will realize that you guys are better off together?"He suggested. I took a bit out of my cereal smiling. "That’s incredible but are you okay with me and your daughter seeing each other?"I asked. "Better than her dating some other guy I don’t know."He replied probably making her breakfast.
I nodded thinking about how it would work. It will I can tell. I know it can it happened the last time. I ate my breakfast and walked back to my room seeing she was no longer in the bed. Where could she be? I shook my head and went to go take a shower thinking this through. Maybe one day this will all end and we can finally live happily ever after.
I love Zariah a lot and something just keeps pushing us apart. What ever that is needs to stop now. I walked into the bathroom seeing that the shower was already on steam coming out of the curtains. I looked at the curtains confused. Did I already turn it on? I walked up to the curtains and pulled it back seeing Zariah bathing. Her eyes opened and she screamed making me jump.
I closed the curtains back and ran out breathing hard. A couple minutes after that… I finally seen Zariah in a towel. She starred at me while I starred at her hers being awkward mine wanting to just rip that to-
"Sorry about that. I didn’t know you were going to take a shower."She said before silence. She nodded her head and walked away. "No, Zariah, come back. I mean, um, its okay, but do you want to go out for lunch?"I asked her. She bit her lip before shaking her head and walking off. Come on you used my shower for peace sakes.
I’m so sorry hopefully I can have these up for you guys! I’m at the library right now! SORRY GUYS! So please know that I update on Wattpad which is Kanyiah Curd. Please read them for my lack of not being on here. I can write stories without wifi on their and publish when I get some! :) So that’s why I have these links! I love you guys so much! :) Bye babes!